


Toronto

by dustiie



Category: Social Network (2010) RPF
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-11
Updated: 2013-07-11
Packaged: 2017-12-19 04:01:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/879228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dustiie/pseuds/dustiie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Andrew finds out the same way everyone else seems to. He's always known better than to google himself or Emma, but ever since Now You See Me started filming, he's been getting many more news about Jesse off gossip websites than he has from his best friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Toronto

Andrew finds out the same way everyone else seems to. He's always known better than to google himself or Emma, but ever since _Now You See Me_ started filming, he's been getting many more news about Jesse off gossip websites than he has from his best friend. It sort of feels weird to say it, but Andrew, of course, still thinks it. Jesse is his best friend. One of the best friends he's _ever_ had, and a little bit of no-contact won't be the thing to change it.

They've been friends for almost four years now, and Jesse has been busy and all. Andrew doesn't blame him. 

 

It's not like Andrew had set up a google alarm for Jesse's name or anything… Well, he had, okay? And there was nothing wrong with that; they'd always be friends, and Andrew wanted to keep himself updated for whenever they saw each other again, they wouldn't have to spend time catching up with each other in weird awkward ways, and could get right down to the serious stuff that always made Andrew think Jesse is one of the smartest, most intuitive people in the entire planet.

 

Jesse, in the photos, is wearing the exact same jeans and the exact same new balance shoes he was wearing the day he and Andrew met in New York, back that one May. That's the first thing that jumps at him, and it sort of feels like he's been roundhouse kicked in the throat. Emma is in the room next door talking to her mum on the phone, so Andrew tries not to worry too much about hiding the way he physically reaches up to cover his mouth when he scrolls through the photographs, one after the other, after the other.

 

It feels a little… like a scam, for many different reasons. For one, the Jesse Andrew knows has always been so discrete and private about his personal life. And then, the way he physically feels that blow is an entire other matter. The Jesse he knew was happy and possibly engaged (he's still not sure on that one) to Anna. Just as happy as he'd been almost four years ago, when both of them were screaming someone else's words at each other's faces until it hurt to breathe, and it hurt to look at each other, because their script tore at them, and their hearts longed even still.

 

Now, Andrew stared gobsmacked at his laptop screen, with his head tilted slightly to the side and his fingertips still lightly pressed over his mouth.

 

Toronto.

 

And it feels so far from Andrew. It feels like they've lived lifetimes, and Jesse hasn't bothered to call.

 

Perhaps Andrew would be more entitled to feeling the darkness that starts to churn in the hollow of his gut if he, himself, hadn't dropped off the face of the earth for a while, whilst filming The Amazing Spiderman. Or The Amazing Spiderman 2. But there'd been times, in between, where Jesse had failed to mention anything at all! And Jesse knew all about Andrew, even when they went _months_ without seeing each other, hearing from each other, communicating _at all_.

Andrew always made sure Jesse found out before the paparazzi caught him. He knew about Emma before _anybody_ else did. He knew about everything before anyone else did, and oftentimes that anybody included Andrew's parents, his brother, even Emma.

 

But Andrew hadn't even known Jesse and Anna had been having troubles at all.

 

He checks so many different sources.

 

And Jesse's even wearing his glasses.

 

Andrew can't help it but to think of early mornings on set, when Jesse was falling asleep on his makeup chair while they did his hair so his curls would look so perfectly helmet-esque. And even then, he'd pretend he'd been reading the entire time, when Andrew'd poke his side and he'd jerk awake.

 

He thinks of the late nights, and the emotional baggage of two different people, and wondering out loud why it wasn't enough for them to feel it in peace. Why they had to feel it too. Wondering out loud, how they each thought Wardo or Mark felt about it now, years and years after. If they still longed for each other the way Andrew felt in his chest in the dead of night.

 

The way he still does sometimes, and he still doesn't know whether it's Wardo calling for Mark and his redvines and redbull breath… Or Andrew, waiting on Jesse, and his stories about his cats, or the smell of olden books that settled at the back of Jesse's neck.

 

It was all hard to digest, hard to process.

Andrew had seen Mia in a bunch of movies, and he knew (because of IMDB) that she and Jesse had been working together for a film that's yet to come out.

There's another pang there, somewhere. Because things that happen on set, stay on set. Things that happen during filming, stay during filming.

That's what Jesse had told him.

Fleeting. Short-lived. Meaningful, but they both had their _real_ lives to return to. _I didn't mean it like-um. Y-You're in my real life, I just, uh, meant…you know. Romantically involved, that's uh… I have Anna, you have Shannon; it's, uh. Bound to end horribly, and I'd much rather remember this, uh, they way it has been up until here_.

It hadn't mattered how much Andrew had argued, that it'd make him a horrible person, but he'd move to New York to be with him. He'd buy Jesse a place in LA, or they could do long distance, he didn't mind, but he wanted Jesse, and he wanted him always, every morning of his life, every coffee-stinking breakfast, and every smoke out in the balcony of some on-location movie they got to film away from each other.

But the more he'd spoken, the sadder Jesse looked. The more bothered. And Andrew, in his own way, rathered having Jesse, smiling and laughing at his jokes, and not his, than… Angry, and sullen, and away. He knew if he drove Jesse away, there'd be an irreplaceable void left in him.

 

That's a little bit of what it felt like now.

 

Andrew had always been so terribly sentient.

 

He didn't like it so much.

 

Not when it felt like his entire chest had been ripped to shreds.

 

Was it because they were both…

 

Jesse insisted that wasn't it.

But how else could Andrew look at it, now? Because Mia was smaller, with soft skin and a warm body, and probably smelt of something classy like--like--Whatever Jesse found attractive in petite, quirky girls and not in…spiderman playing englishmen.

 

It was in the spur of the moment: poorly thought through.

He picked up the phone without thinking, and instantly he was stammering out "S-Sorry, Em! Hi, Krista--I--Sorry!" And promptly hanging up.

 

He pulled out his phone then. And he'd have to pay for that international call, instead of just leaving it to the hotel to sort out, but it was important, and it was necessary.

 

And as he's flipping through his contacts, he's wondering if Jesse maybe has changed his number, and it's rancour, a little bit, that has him bitterly mumbling about how Jesse's already changed one hell of a lot, a new phone number wouldn't even surprise him!

 

But the line rings, unholy beep after unholy beep, and Andrew is getting angrier and angrier each second, until--

 

Until.

 

"Hello?" Greets him, and it's like an entire icicle has instantly melted off his chest.

"Jess…" He greets, and he's almost breathless. He doesn't know if it's because of how worked up he got himself, or just because… just because that's what Jesse did to him. Four years, and Andrew is just as smitten as the first day he walked into that stupid read-through that changed his entire life for the better.

God, he knows Jesse will say something about Andrew's comment on MJ being a dude, or the fact that he'll probably intuitively know that he's always been longing for Jesse to dip his curls in tomato sauce or something just for the duration of the third film, and Oh, God, Jesse is gonna reprimand him, and Andrew won't even feel bad about it, and he's already smiling so hard it hurts his cheeks and, he's doubled over himself a little bit in bed, grinning like an idiot just at having heard his voice.

"A-Andrew! Hi, wow, it's been--it's been--"

"A while. I know." Was almost a sigh of sorts, breathy and lax. Andrew hadn't realised how much he missed this. Just talking, even if they weren't saying anything at all. "I like your glasses."

 

And he can hear the smile Jesse gives him through the phone. And Mia or no Mia, contact or no, People Magazine, EW, didn't matter.

Jesse was still Jesse, in Toronto or in New York. With Anna or Mia or whomever. A little bit of no-contact couldn't change that fact.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't even know what this is.


End file.
